Homosexuality differs from being gay in that it involves a preference
for the same sex. And the derisory and derogatory terms abound faggot,
bent, fairy mostly applied by the ignorant. That ignorance can also
have its malicious streak.
There are two kinds of homosexual
the genetically maladjusted, who fantasise to the extreme about being the
opposite sex; and the failed lover. Both may have a motive root in their
overall upbringing, but more of that and also on the repercussions of failed
The term homosexual is used here
to designate men or women who have intimate sexual relations with a member
of the same sex.
The term also implies an adult and wilful
decision to participate in such relations and is not used to designate those
who would experiment on a first time
basis, nor is it used to designate persons of either sex who may be bullied
into submitting to homosexual experiences. More of that later too.
Homosexuality gay, or unhappy abandon?
Its strange how paranoid some folk get whenever the subject of being gay
seems in danger of coming up. It is also strange how us humans can be so
fearful and socially reticent about something as simple as the subject of
The homosexual probably ranks
among the most pilloried and marginalised members of modern society despite
the prevalence of the so-called freedoms of the enlightened age.
must be fully
considered before any meaningful understanding of individual traits can
Any attempt at understanding
the homosexual without the benefit of a detailed examination of past experience
is shallow and imprecise and leads only to superficial labelling.
There is a vital difference
between someone who is considered 'gay', or bisexual and someone who is
Homosexuality is being preferentially
attracted to those of the same sex, whereas being 'gay' or 'bi' is to engage
in sexual activities with those of either sex.
Then there was the 42-year-old
woman who used to try telling me how she could recognise gay men because
of their 'weak jaw line'. ì
A sad pile of codswallop, it
has to be said. Anyway, I could never take this revelation of hers at all
seriously as when I met the woman she was herself one of the most inhibited
females I had encountered to that date. It took me a long time to get her
to simply enjoy sexual experiences and even then she was always feeling
guilty. She ended up with a 'nice man', as she put it and hopefully she
found happiness, though somehow I can't bet on it.
The existence of 'gay' lovers
is a profound statement about the world we have created. Being gay is little
more than a cry or craving for the basic human attentions and affections
that most people take for granted. And like they say, those who live in
glass houses should not throw stones.
Given such cries, the question
arises as to why such isolation exists to begin. What extreme of isolation
spurs the crossing of the barriers of accepted 'normality'?
will find few sensible conclusions looked at through the straitjacket of
the status quo. The Victorian explorer who discovered a 'lost' Hindu temple
in India and then proceeded to vilify the Hindu religion as 'debased' and
having inferior moral values to his own Victorian upbringing did little
more than reveal the absurdity of ignorant prejudice.
Sure the temple was completely
adorned with images of men and women in all positions of lovemaking. It
was what these ancient people believed in, what their history had led them
But reverting to the theme of
this article. Being gay means just thatand gay means lively; bright,
colourful; playful, merry; pleasure-loving, dissipated. You could also say
it means being happy. And how many people are happy? How many are looking
forwards to happiness arriving tomorrow and spending today in the glumdocks
instead of simply being happy with what they have at the time? Dreams can
always remain, no matter the state of today.
And one thing is for sure. Men
and women enjoying themselves in a loving sexual manner are far less dangerous
and stupid than the armed crusader out to crush any kind of belief that
exists beyond a self-held blinkered vision.
And if you have read so far
and wonder where this might be going, well, the Gay label is nothing more
nor nothing less than a recognition of a certain state of mind at a certain
point in time.
Because after all, no matter
which way you cut it, isnt life all about trying to have fun in a
world of give and take?
This essay deals with three essentials:
* Motive roots,
looks at each individually and also attempts to explore the effect
of motive roots on both.
The Genetically Maladjusted
Such individuals are in
constant turmoil and confusion as long as they feel trapped within
a body of the wrong sex.
They also remain caught
in the confusion of their personal sexuality, despite their proclamations.
The great majority are closet cases who lack a trusted
confidant and who therefore deal with their situation in a feeling
of some isolation.
In the case of those with
homosexual tendencies associated with genetic maladjustment, the individual
formative backgrounds are an important element to understanding, by
the individual concerned as well as by others with an interest. ì
The homosexual in general is constantly challenged
by the potential to be an unwillingly dangerous animal within the
status quo as the bounds of conceptually accepted standards have already
failed lover is someone who feels cheated by the demise of a relationship
and cheated in life as a result. Lack of support particularly after
a bitter collapse of a relationship can leave the individual particularly
vulnerable to self-doubt. It is easy to use the words 'be strong'
from the vantage of relative stability. The reality for an isolated
individual can be far different.
is an end product and not a born trait. This is an important aspect
in a world of persecution in which the concept of homosexuality is
itself a target of much ridicule.
negative repercussions of a broken relationship can be powerfully